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8/16/2004 - WizardWorld 2004 Write Up
For those of you who don't know, WizardWorld is a huge-ass comic book/Card/Misc. nerdy shit convention in the heart of Chi-town. I am totally going to tell you about it now. It ended up being the best birthday gift ever, and I shall always remember my 15th year of life simply for the reason that this happened in it. "WizardWorld 2004: YOUR RESISTANCE IS USELESS. IT IS USELESS TO RESIST IT." By Greg Mercer. It was around 10 AM on Friday the 13th. While usually a date of misfortune for most, I have always found good things to come my way on this rare date. That just so happened to be the case on this particular date, as I told my mother of Folin's plans to head to the large con which I was orignially slated to go to. "Wait, he's going?" "Yeah." "Well, can you tag along with him?" "I thought I couldn't go because I have school on Monday." "Yeah, but you're going to be back by Sunday." "Well, then why couldn't I go in the first place?" "Various reasons. Your brother was in Florida, and we really didn't hae enough for me, you and (Folin) to go." "Oh. Well, i'll call him." I did just that, and after a few minutes of calling back and forth, my future was altered. I was heading to Chicago to meet my idol, and pick up some neat swag." "Okay, here's the deal, though. This is pretty expensive, and it's coming out of your total birthday cash and prizes. Are you sure you want to go?" "Yeah." "Okay. I was going to get you an iPod, though. "...Well...yeah, i'll go with WizardWorld." After packing, I was driven to an IHOP, and to Folin's house. After that, we were in his van, ready for the con. Unfortunatley, it was a 4-hour drive, and we ventured off into the slightly flickering sun around 6. I read...something on the way up until I attempted a nap around 8. Around 9:30, Folin's dad pulled out a portable DVD player, and Clerks: The Animated Series was popped in. We watched most of the first disc until we got to the rather fancy hotel, around 10. We stepped into the comfortable looking room. Look at your thumb. From the tip to where it attaches to the palm, that's how deep the pizza we ordered was. We literally could not even attempt to eat it until forks were grabbed. Growing up on cardboard-flat New York style pizza, this was quite a change, as it looked more like pumpkin pie than pizza at first glance. After a quick watching of Lost in Translation, sleep was had. The next morning, Folin's dad and sister woke early to go swimming. And, of course, they meet Kevin Smith on the elevator. Folin and I wake up and after quick matinecne of hygene by all, we trek down to the convention. Sweet fucking zombies. Above the con is a hallway which leads to the entrance, and in this hallway, there are windows looking down at the con. It is through only these windows that you can really appreciate the whole convention. There are single booths larger than all of BASHcon. We get down to the floor, get badges, bags full of free goodies, and immediatley run to the line for tickets to the Kevin Smith Q&A. This line was maybe 1/8th of our entire visit. It wrapped around the whole building, and not even halfway, a voice came over the PA: "Ladies and Gentlemen, tickets for the Kevin Smith signing have just sold out." Fortunatley, we weren't there for the signing. But when the announcment was made, a kid farther ahead of us dropped to his knees and shouted "DAMMIT!" Also: Before we got out of the line, we saw not one, but TWO Wolfwood cosplayers. One with a very large, thick cross, and a remarkably depressing one, with balding orange hair. After getting through the big-ass line Folin and I decide to go browsing around, because it's a convention and that's the type of shit you do. Passing down just one asile, you can really see the enormous scope of not only different people attentding, but the different comics there are. Superhero comics, horror comics, soap-opera like comics aimed at girls, soap-opera like comics aimed at males, the entire spectrum. It's really like regular, text based books: There's tons of ideas out there, but only a select few will ever be seen. And if you're trying to crack into the buisness, you better be fucking remarkably orignial. Then we saw it. The View Askew booth. Everything you can buy on the site can be bought here. With $100 of birthday money in hand, I readied myself for the largest nerdgasm ever experienced by myself. Without even seeing everything they had to offer, I forked over $20 for a set of Walt and Steve-Dave action figures. Then I realized it. Someone special was selling those action figures to me. Someone important. I looked. It was Steve-Dave himself. It was like God was smiling at me. But little did I know that this would be a small morsel of what was to come. After browsing the whole booth, I bought a "Buddy Christ" dashboard figure. I can only imagine our lord and savoiur going "How YOU doin'?" We wandered for a long while after, and eventually came up to the Playstation booth, where they were showcasing Sly Cooper 2, Gran Turismo 4, Jak 3, Spider-Man 2, Syphon Filter: The Omega Strain, SOCOM 2, Ratchet and Clank: Up Your Arsenal, and, everyone's favorite game at a party when you're pretty hammered, the EyeToy. At this point, I have two free comic books, two action figures, a manga sampler, and a small Heroclix figurine in my bag. This would change when we ventured down the halls to a booth with Halo action figures. I couldn't help myself, and grabbed a Master Chief. I gave Folin $15 to buy a Warthog, complete with small drivers. It was then that I was assaulted by enormous fucking walls of happy neko neko wai~! manga. I enjoy the stuff, I really do, but over 10,000 books on one wall is just too much. We took a turn, and found a much more reasonable happy neko neko wai~! booth. It was here that I bought two CDs, "FLCL OST 1: Addict", and the self titled album by "The Black Mages". If you don't know the Black Mages, you really should. At this point, I need a bigger bag. We stop by the TokyoPop booth, and pick up free manga they had left over from last year. As we exit, I am asked by a woman, "Want a free comic book?" "You bet your ass I do!" I reply. It is then that I realize that I am a whore for free stuff. By the end of the day, half of the stuff I had was payed for with zero dollars and zero cents on my end. I love this con. As we head back to the Playstation booth to play some Spider-Man 2, Folin alerts me that Jason Mewes, AKA "Jay" is at the View Askew booth. We attempt to get to him, but it's too late. There's already 500 people surrounding the guy, asking for autographs. He looks different without all his hair. He also has a goatee now, which I found an odd choice. Folin and I walk around a bit more, and make some really funny jokes that I don't remember too well. It's then that we realize it's 1:30. Time to go get in line for the Q&A. We do just that, and meet back up with Folin's father and younger sister. After a relativley short few minutes, we are ushered into the lecture hall. This is it, the man will be here. Kevin fucking Smith, my idol. We get front row seats. Unfortunatley, they're a bit too close to the end. I'm sure we'll manage, though. After a couple minutes, Kevin walks out on the stage. The Q&A begins. I could repeat a bunch of it to you, but it was really long, and there's just too much to say. I'll just say it was the hardest i've laughed ever. I was panting due to lack of breath by the end. My abs were burning from so much humour. Also, this really hot redhead was checking me out, and I was checking her out. If only I wasn't so fucking shy, you know? I suppose now is a good time to mention something I noticed really, really quickly. There are so many hot women at these conventions that you will have to rub your neck after all the turning of your head. Best of all, many of them were cosplaying as totally hot characters. I believe there was one point where a cosplayer dressed as Rikku in her dancer outfit walked by. I turned to Folin and said "This cannot get any better." And wouldn't you know it, it got better, as Rikku, Selphie, and Riona walked by, each just as hot as the last one. And if you're into dudes, there was no shortage of guys there. Anyway. After the Q&A, Folin and I bolted to the View Askew booth, because we knew Kevin and Jay would be there. Looks like others had the same idea. Fortunatley, it wasn't as crowded as I would've thought, and we reached a corner only a few tables away from Kevin. A makeshift line was formed, and half an hour and 15 feet later, I added a Jay inaction figure and a Bob inaction figure to my bag. It was then that I reached him. I had Kevin Smith sign my Buddy Christ. It was amazing talking to the man for the 15 seconds that I did, before fans less polite than I pulled me away. After that, we had to leave. Was it all worth an iPod? Yeah, yeah it was. With money you squeeze from the peasants //Greg::1:03 PM EST\ # | |
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